Samantha Garner, Freelance Web Writer & Editor

This spelling & grammar installment isn’t a pet peeve, as they usually are. It’s just general word love. I recently noticed that someone had arrived at my blog through a Google search for “grammar of ‘i am won’t.’” It took me a minute or two to understand that the question really was about the word wont. So, in case you ever come back this way, Mystery Googler, here is your answer:

What is the difference between wont and won’t?

The word wont talks about someone in the habit of doing something, or of a characteristic of something. To use it in a couple of sentences:

“Samantha was wont to think about spelling too much.”
“Tomorrow will be quiet, as Sundays are wont to be.”

The word won’t, as I bet you already know, is a contraction meaning will not.

So, this one’s easy. It’s really a spelling thing, since speaking the two words aloud will tell you right away if you’re saying the wrong one – and if you’re saying wont, people might mishear you and think you’re saying want, depending on your accent. This adds a bit more excitement to life! Actually, the pronunciation might help you determine which one you want to write out. Wont sounds like want, and you wouldn’t spell want with an apostrophe, like won’t!

Oh wow. Was I getting carried away there or what? Sorry, spelling tends to do that to me.

The post title comes from a question I came across on LinkedIn a few months ago, and it’s been knocking around in my head ever since. I suppose the only way to really answer this question is subjectively. There isn’t, as far as I know (and if there is, I bet I’m in trouble), a governing body for copywriters that calls us to a copywriting bar or something.

So. What education is needed to become a copywriter? My subjective answer is: absolutely none. And here is why I say this: I am a copywriter and I have no education.

Well, not no education. I did graduate high school, but that’s about it. I know now that I can hold some out-of-date opinions about how to move through the world. This was evidenced when, upon graduating high school, I decided it would be more logical to spend my post-high school years in the working world. I would enter at the lowest level and work my way up, just like in the wholesome ’50s! At the time, I dreamed of working in publishing. I sent my wee resume along to every publisher in Toronto, with a cheeky letter saying, essentially, “I love books and will sweep floors if I have to.” I was surprised at the time that nobody took me up on this too-good-to-miss offer.

I ended up working in restaurants, pursuing web and magazine writing opportunities as they arose in my free time. As always, I read a lot and wrote as much as I could, getting used to adapting my voice and tone to the subject matter. After a few years I moved to Calgary and began working office jobs, including my first marketing & communications job, which I held for five years. The rest, if I may be cheesy, is history.

Now, I’m not advocating shunning post-secondary education in the least. In fact, by rights I shouldn’t have even got that job I just mentioned – the posting called for someone with a BA. It was just luck that they overlooked that. I’m merely saying that, with copywriting, all you really need to succeed is a good grasp of spelling and grammar and a way with words. I have those things naturally (tooting my own horn, yes). I like to think that early employers took a chance on me because they liked my writing (I still hold the record for best speller at the aforementioned marketing & communications job), and sensed how much I love writing.  As a freelance copywriter, I’ve not had a single prospective client ask about my education. They only care about how awesome I can make their project sound. In the end, experience spoke louder for me than any degree I could get.

What do you think? Is higher education necessary to become a copywriter?

(Image courtesy of stock.xchng user tsunei.)

So I’m reading this novel right now. It’s good, but it uses the word “which” in a way that really bugs me. This spelling & grammar pet peeve has been a fairly recent, but intense, one of mine for the past couple of years.

Dear editor of novel: The word “which” is not a synonym for “and,” “anyway” or even a period. Here is an example from the book:

“And if you tell him you saw me smoking, I will banish you to the lowest circle of hell. Which I’ve never been there, but . . .”

Now I’m not going to get all academic on you here (I couldn’t even if I wanted to, anyway), but “which” is a pronoun. That means it refers directly to something that’s been mentioned in a conversation, or refers to the people having the conversation.

The character in the example I used should say either, ” . . . the lowest circle of hell, which I’ve never been to, but . . .” or drop it altogether. If he says which in the way I just suggested, he’s referring directly to the lowest circle of hell. In the way that appears the book, he’s using it to refer to, “I’ve never been there” – a future, entirely new point – which is redundant and makes no sense at all. He’s using which to indicate an afterthought, in which case a, “come to think of it” at the beginning or “anyway” at the end of the thought would suffice. Actually, in this example, dropping it altogether would make the most sense.

I know the example I used is from a character speaking, but that doesn’t make it right! Using which to signify an afterthought or make a new point isn’t a regionalism as far as I know, so it gets no pass from me. No sir!

I hope the above made sense. The thing with me is I usually feel it when a word is used wrong or a sentence is composed badly, but I can’t often put it into words. A loud clanging bell goes off somewhere in my torso. I think it’s my mutant superpower.

English is a notoriously difficult language to learn. My parents are Finnish and Filipino, respectively, and while I don’t speak either of those languages, I can read them aloud near-perfectly. This is because, compared to English, they are easy! There are no silent letters and each letter is pronounced only one way. It’s a dream.

English, on the other hand. Yikes. I think I love it so much because it’s so impossible and weird. Case in point: the video on this page my husband showed me which demonstrates how the I Before E “rule” should, by rights, take 40 seconds to recite.

This one isn’t actually a pet peeve of mine, but my huband’s. However, I think it’s an interesting one so I’m sharing it today.

Before I met my husband, I thought, like lots of others, I thought “begging the question” was the same as “raising the question” – like, “It’s Donut Friday, which begs the question – why am I not eating a donut right now?” It turned out, that’s totally incorrect.

“Begging the question” is actually a logical fallacy. Sounds complicated, but basically, begging the question is a statement that assumes its conclusion is proven correct without any evidence. Like this:

“If donuts weren’t delicious, then everyone wouldn’t eat them.”

In this sentence, the assumption is being made that its conclusion – everyone eats donuts – is true, without any proof of that. Just stating something doesn’t make it true. It’s also using that assumption as evidence that donuts are delicious. For these reasons, this sentence is begging the question.

Make sense? I hope I’ve explained that clearly. As you can tell from the examples in this post, my thought power is being eclipsed by donuts right now. My friend Teri and I have been talking about the office tradition of Donut Fridays, and I’ve decreed freelancers can also take part in it. Granted, those working from home will lack the anticipation of the endless possibility contained within the Tim Hortons box, but even still, I’m off to get a donut. Have a good day!

Today’s Spelling & Grammar Sunday will be a pretty quick one too. I find, with “they’re/their/there,” people are most often wondering which one is the right one, so I won’t go into too much detail. I’ll just list when you use each one.

When to use “They’re”

Like “you’re,” “they’re” is a contraction. It’s a contraction for the phrase “they are.” So, you can either say “they are in the garden,” or “they’re in the garden.” Use this one also to talk about the way someone is, like “they’re cranky.”

When to use “Their”

For this one, think of people. If you’re talking about something a person has or possesses, it’s “their.” Their hair. Their breakfast. Their thoughts, etc.

When to use “There”

“There” is different from the other two because it’s a place. If you’re talking about a place in the distance, it’s “there.”