Office culture for the self-employed
22 May
Next week contains my last day working a traditional day job. After much hemming and hawing and budget reviewing with my husband, I resigned from my job in order to focus on my freelancing full time. I’m nervous, but mostly very excited. I feel like it’s finally the best time and things have been going well so far.
After so many years working in an office, the prospect of being self-employed is sort of a strange one for me. I’m typically a pretty reserved person anyway, so I look forward to cultivating all kinds of strange tics and habits after so many hours alone all day. However, I have realized I can still replicate the office environment, which I will do in the following ways:
- I will finish a pot of coffee in the morning and not make a new one. In the afternoon, I will go for a cup of coffee, find the pot empty and make a new pot with a lot of banging and huffing, cursing that jerk who took the last cup.
- I will construct a water cooler out of scrap paper and envelopes and lean against it, gossiping to myself about myself.
- I will prank myself every Tuesday. I think my first prank will be to cover my desk, chair, laptop, pens and file folders with cling film. I can’t wait to see the look on my face!
- I will explode my lunch in the microwave and not clean it up, then send myself a passive-aggressive email titled, “Your Mother Doesn’t Work Here!”
It should be fun!




